Tuesday, November 25, 2008


You're eyes outlined
in sleepless nights,
the tears you've cried.
Is it really too late
to make this right?

I'll be patient,
if you tell me to be.
But behind these questions,
do you know what I need?

Tick tock...tick tock...
your life is wasting away.
No more choices,
only a price you've paid.

And your wall of lies
has crumbled in agony.
Yet that guilt remains,
a sorrow so sweet.
Just wave your white flag
and surrender to defeat.


Bela said...

Aaahh! Help! I had NO idea what I was doing here!

Also: I need more poem ideas...big BIG plans! Okay, so...help. Thanks!

Gina said...

You must REALLY be sleepless, since you said "You're" instead of "Your" in the very first line.

I think you should change the title to something like "Insomnia" or "Sleepless Guilt" or just simply "Sleepless", or even "Sleepless Surrender".

Gina said...

1. Imagine you are Dorothea Dix. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dorothea_Dix#Antebellum_career

2. Make fun of Twilight in flowing form. Make sure to use the words "beautiful" and "perfect" at least three times each.

3. Write a poem about not knowing what to write a poem about.

4. Write about forgetting what you were going to write a poem about and the agony of the shortcomings of the human brain.

5. Watch this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2BEhk1fqZo
WITHOUT looking up the English translation (assuming you're not a fluent French speaker.) Write about what you think the song is about. Then find the lyrics and translate them into English (the YouTube video with English subtitles seems to have been removed, sorry) and write a poem about what you think about the song now.

6. Make a metaphor comparing the water cycle to a mother's fastidious household habits.

7. Listen to Tally Hall (on YouTube)

Bela said...

Huh. WOW. I must be...I'll change that! Thanks!

I like "Insomnia"! What do you think about "Surrender"?

Haha! Thanks for the ideas! Huh...I'd love to use that twilight one. Seriously though, how contrived can her books get?

Okay, I'm done with the Stephanie Meyer bashing...for now. Mwahaha!

Anyways, thanks for the ideas!

Gina said...

Reading this over again, the theme of this poem seems to be more along the lines of a planned interrogation, so maybe a title with a question-related word in it?

"Inquest"? But I'm not really sure what that means, look it up and tell me later.

I personally think the Twilight series (having finished Twilight in two days and now about halfway through New Moon upon the insistence of a friend) makes for entertaining, mildly engaging, and often (unintentionally) hilarious reading. Maria is currently reading Twilight and is keeping tabs on the number of times any form of the words "beautiful" and "perfect" are used throughout the course of the entire novel.

To answer your question, they can be VERY contrived. Of course, most people don't realize how much of the books consist of fluff, because I think this is the first time in a while that a vampire book has gone mainstream on such a big level. A friend told me that she likes the Twilight books because "they trigger my imagination." This is coming from a girl who probably knows more about reggaeton than fantasy, so I didn't have the heart to tell her that there are so many better books out there to trigger her imagination. But I think we should be grateful that Ms. Meyer is pulling a few people away from VH1 for a couple of hours to sit down and read. That's pretty cool at any time, don't you think?

Bela said...

Hmm...not so much interrogation. Perhaps confrontation? That seems a bit more like what I was going for here. Honestly, it's just word vomit. I decide the category later. Yay for, um, Word Vomit!

Wow! You've got to tell me how many times those words are used! At 4 books and a minimum of 400 pages a book, plus an extra 300 for Breaking Dawn, my guess is 2,387 times. Hold me to that.

Inquest - (N) an inquiry into the cause of an unexpected death. (definition by Google Search Engine)

Well, at least Twilight HAS sparked some literary interest for young readers! Because of that, a standing ovation for Ms. Meyer...for doing the impossible!

Maria said...

It almost bothers me, as a recovering fantasy/sci-fi addict, that so much of the series occurs in the "real world". Sometimes, I want to scream at Stephenie Meyer, "Just get on with it already! We don't care about Bella's useless friends! THEY DO NOT MATTERRRR!" and then sigh dramatically.


"Unsate"? What kind of a word verification is that?

Maria said...

BTW I've been keeping tabs on "marble", "lovely", "dazzling", and "smolder" since book 2 (New Moon).


"marress"? Hmm... reminds me of matricide *laughs quietly about inside joke*